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I’ve hijacked Harriett’s Dog Blog

Hello people, it is I, Ramona

Yes, Ramona. I’ve hijacked Harriett’s Dog Blog this month as I seem to be getting a bit of a bad rep, so I thought I’d set the record straight.

I am the 2nd youngest of the 5 furs. I am by far the most intelligent and superior of them all. Sam, my brother-from-another-mother-but-same-father could challenge me for intelligence, but he’s too busy sucking up to the humans, sleeping and eating. Not to mention being just plain annoying.

Lucy, who is the oldest of us all, is an embarrassment to the feline species. She is very lucky she has looks on her side, because there is not a shred of intelligence in that little head of hers. She is also grumpy and old. She is so easy to tease.

Hugo is, I hate to admit it, adorable. He’s a big teddy bear and I love him. He lets me cuddle up to him at night, and I love it when we go for walks around the farm. In return for cuddles I flick him cat biscuits from the bench. The main human, who I will call Mum, has no idea this happens as I always do it when she is not looking. Dad, the other human has seen me, but like he should – has kept quiet about the situation.

Harriett sweet Harriett. She is very easy to love damn it. She is cute and funny, and we really do have a good time. Also good for cuddles at night. She is however exceptionally clingy when it comes to Mum. Always has to be on her, near her or at least see her. This does pose a problem when I require a cuddle. I do have to quite literally push Harriett out of the way.

H & H (that's what I call them for short) wear Heyrex monitor things on their collars. Apparently this Heyrex guy monitors their rest, exercise, scratching and the like. He keeps any eye on them when Mum can't. Well, I tried to talk Harriett into giving me hers the other day, I just know that the amount of exercise I do would blow Heyrex’s mind. I'm mean, someone with my hunting skills, speed and grace surely would be a thing of wonder. Will keep working on getting that Heyrex monitor off Harriett. It’ll be fairly easy of I can get my paws on extra cat biscuits.

Now, let me clear something up. Yes I went away for a couple of days, no I was not lost. I had no idea I was required to be home by a certain time. I don’t have a watch, it was lovely weather, so no need to come home. I had plenty of food as I am an exceptionally skilled hunter and there are always plenty of mice in the paddocks. I have two words regarding the reaction to me going away. Mountain. Molehill.

You will no doubt be hearing about my other ‘incident’. So I will get in first. I knew us felines were going to the vets. I heard Mum on the phone. I don’t do vet visits. So I stayed out until I knew it was too late. Yes, I could hear Mum calling me. No, I was not going to be subject to a vet visit. But I got tricked. Mum sent Dad off with the other two felines in the car. I didn’t realise that there was only Dad in the car. So when I thought the coast was clear, I came inside. Only to find Mum waiting. With the cat box. So damn, a vet visit I had to endure. Worst. Experience. Ever.

So, as far as where I sit in the most loved category of all the furs. It would be number one. Mum tells me all the time how much she loves me. And why wouldn’t she? I am exceptionally loveable.

So here is a photo of me, in all my glory. You can just see the superiority glowing from me. Not to mention intelligence.

That is all I have time for today. Too busy and important to write any more.

Ramona

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